Disclaimer: I claim no expertise or scholarly tree of knowledge on the subject of LGBTIQAP, so I can only speak from what I know and have read around the internet. SOGIE is a complex subject to talk about. Writing this is my way of gauging how much I understand myself and my identity and of many others’. I originally wrote the following text for my Facebook friends to see and in celebration of #biweek. Living in the Philippines, I don’t think the general public is truly aware of this subject. Most of the LGBTIQAP discussions still happen in the academia. I know it within me that I want a discourse on bisexuality to occur in my FB space, with the people who know me–family, friends, and acquaintances. Whether or not that would happen, only time and people’s current interests will tell. If you have any feedback or if you want to share your story with me, please feel free to drop a comment! I want to know more stories and, in the process learn more about the bisexual community, too! Thank you.
Seriously, though. I’ve never been in a relationship, so there might be some of you who question my sexuality–how I myself am convinced that “bisexual” is the identity label that suits me. But here’s the thing: someone else can’t decide what I identify as. I can do it myself.
Google is everyone’s friend, but the best definition of bisexuality that I have come across is by a gender and sexuality advocate, Robyn Ochs. I’ll just quote it here:
“Bisexuals are people who acknowledge in themselves the potential to be attracted—romantically and/or sexually—to people of more than one gender, not necessarily at the same time, not necessarily in the same way, and not necessarily to the same degree.”
I mean, it perfectly encapsulates what kind of person I am. [But if I’m gonna be more specific, I am more likely to identify as biromantic demisexual–but let’s not talk about that for now. Bisexual is good enough for me. :3]
For me, it’s hard to imagine how it is like to only fall for men. And I can’t help but love the gorgeous women, the beautiful, charismatic tomboys and the effeminate gay guys. And, well, I underwent a difficult phase of self-doubt and confusion, questioning myself for ever liking other girls instead of simply looking at them as “role models” of femininity. It was all the more difficult when I felt that I may be the only person in my social bubbles who is like this, fearing that no one could possibly ever understand.
I can’t speak for all bisexuals, but I want to share some snippets of my story. Not today but at another time, so this won’t end up long and too much to digest. For now, this short post is what I hope people would contemplate. ^^
Thanks for reading~
Happy Bi Week! Bi Visible!